porta potty

I wish I could change the world, but South Carolina is always going to be the bottom of the porta potty.

I hear all the yapping about get out and vote. Sorry, friends. It’s a scam. This country has been bought and sold and the only thing going on here is the corporations that control the country. It’s a pathetic little gesture to us, voting, to make us think we have a voice. We don’t.

The administration is planning to use words to eliminate transgender people from their reality. WTH? I’m guessing POTUS would love some time with a tranny as long as his wife isn’t around.

There is praise from the Oval Office for a guy who body-slammed and punched a journalist and broke his glasses. Can I get praise if I do the same thing to the senators who confirmed Kavanaugh?

[In reference to Rant and Rave, Oct. 17] Dear Mr. 54-year-old seeking classic rock 'n' roll in the Cola area: I’m in a local band called Last Call. We play lots of good, real, kick ass rock from the 1960s thru the 1990s. We are just getting going (newly formed). We will be gigging soon! Please come check us out. To find out where and when we’ll be playing go to Facebook and find us at “Last Call” SC based rock band, then look for us in “groups.” Thanks, are you ready to rock?!

About the rave for the incumbent politician [Rant and Rave, Oct. 17]: In that election, four out of every 10 votes did NOT go to the incumbent. Now, THAT’S embarrassing! By the way, there is a revolution coming, and there are MANY women and young people in it.

To the individual with negative comments about the Southern culture [Rant and Rave, Oct. 17]. I hardly think “bad weather “ is Southern culture or culture of any kind. In fact, spending a huge amount of time, effort and energy constantly removing snow and ice for half the year must be your desire.

I was rude. But, I’m trying to get America to be the America that it’s supposed to be. It’s supposed to be the land of the free and the home of the brave, not the land of the free and the home of the slaves. Slavery is over.

Let me tell you how important black people are to America, white folks. If every black person stopped working for any American corporation, right now, what would American whites do? A lot of them would carry on. But a lot of them could commit suicide because the money wouldn’t be coming in. The Mexicans can’t do it like us.

Lobster tails, crab legs, shrimp, filet mignon, all that good s#!t y’all eating? Y’all better eat good now. Let’s do the right thing so everybody can eat, everybody can be happy and everybody can get along, man. That’s not too hard. God said it can be done, so why can’t we get it done?

We can’t take too much more of this right here.

I’ll say it again: Security is the lowest paid thing on the scale, but when hurricanes and everything else are coming this way, everybody else can stay put, but security’s got to get out and get in their boats or whatever they can get here on to make sure they cover these people’s property. The governor or the property owners need to start paying security personnel what they are worth. They are putting their life and their vehicles on the line to cover these people’s property.

Hey, I would just like to say that Lindsey Graham should have been gone a long time ago, because he is nothing but Donald Trump’s do-boy.

I ate an apple the other day. I said, “This one has good insecticide.”

Yeah, I’ve got a question for Preach. Robitussin, is that what you give your robot when it has a cold?

The Free Times October 10 edition has a cover that says “Sticking Around: Why Millennials Are Finally Choosing Columbia.” If you look at the photo, what do they have in their hands? I think that speaks volumes.

Why did the pervert cross the road? He couldn’t get his d#!k out of the chicken?

Yep, it’s another rave for Palmetto Federal Credit Union. We have some very important business to talk over with the lady who helps us there, but we can’t drive there. When we talked to her about that on the phone, she volunteered to block out one full hour of her time to discuss our problems over the phone. How many places can you get that kind of service?

Want to know who your best people are or who should be getting a higher wage? Look who was there to hold the fort when Hurricane Michael came through. Just look and see who was there to hold the fort. That will tell you who your best people are.

Let the Dummycrats and the Repulsicans think themselves red and blue and go at it. The rest of us who are red, white and blue will try to heal this country. Amen.

I don’t really enjoy Lucky Charms cereal, but I do like the marshmallow unicorns.

Hey, for Halloween any lady with a short skirt and black stockings that wants to come by my house, have at it. Thanks.

When those transformers go off, you feel a little sorry for them. But then you lose power.

At a gas station, they were giving a free video copy of Clemson University history. I said, “No, thanks.”

My friend went to a restaurant and ordered a tuna fish sandwich. He didn’t like it because it had mayonnaise. Hmm.

In an answer to the question in Free Times Rant and Rave on October 10: Yes, people still have landline phones. I even have one that has a spinning thing on there so I can dial it myself, and all.

Yeah, I was really impressed that SCE&G was on TV saying that they are prepared for all the power outages in Columbia. I’d really love to watch the news and see what’s going on with the storm, but it’s been 13 hours and I still have no power. They should build a power plant.

The Trump administration should be renamed the Penis Gallery.

This is a rave to Tug Baker. How’d he get the name Tug?

Donald Trump is truly blessed by who his enemies are and how they act.

This is a rave to all the linemen in the United States who go out after storms and restore power to the people.

The reason the economy is better under conservatives than liberals is because liberals have never figured out how to have a thriving economy without the people they don’t like getting rich. So, they try to regulate everything.

Three of my friends and I go out to lunch every Friday. We call ourselves the lunch crew. Be on the lookout. Yeah.

My friend was watching some old-timey television. Is Dr. Joyce Brothers related to the Smothers Brothers? Yeah.

I bought a new cap the other day and left the sticker on it. I wanted to be gangsta.

USC lost to Texas A&M. The Chicken Curse lives on.

Confucius says, “A true friend never gets in your way, unless you happen to be going down.”

I had a turkey leg at the State Fair. That turkey must have been on steroids.

My friend Twista’s favorite sports are tetherball, badminton and dodgeball.

Instead of out doing real lawman work, y’all are out here giving real working folks tickets so their insurance rates go through the roof like SCE&G isn’t already breaking it off in us. I bet none of you little p#!sies have a blemish on your driving record.

It’s all well and good for Superintendent of Education Molly Spearman to recognize teachers at the Carolina football games and get her face on the jumbotron. I wish she would spend as much time fighting with the Legislature to get money to pay teachers what they actually deserve. Molly seems to think being a cheerleader is the same as being a leader. It isn’t.

The South Carolina lottery system should be changed from being for college scholarships to supporting K-12 education.

[Dog barking loudly] That was my dog saying, “Richland County, administrative organized crime at its best!”

There is a secret society of men who run naked in California.