Random Aggression: A 19-year-old man and a 21-year-old man drove around the Lexington area vandalizing mailboxes, with one of the suspects driving an SUV while the other guy leaned out the window to smash mailboxes. A 19-year-old and a 21-year-old? Dudes, this seems more like the prank of a 16-year-old. You guys should either take up a hobby (PlayStation 4, maybe) or get girlfriends. I hear that’s what all the 20-somethings are doing. This has to be one of the more meaningless crimes in recent memory.
Xanax Smoothie: In another meth bust in the Lexington area, authorities arrested a 33-year-old woman and a 35-year-old man. Authorities were hipped to the scene after reports of possible drug activity going on. When they arrived, they found the usual makings of a DIY meth kit but also found a blender containing white powder. It turned out to be blended Xanax pills. Not sure if Xanax is supposed to be used like whey protein, but that seems kind of weird.
Hotwired Backhoe: A 27-year-old man and a 20-year-old man broke into a fenced-in maintenance area near an Irmo soccer field and hotwired a backhoe. The suspects then drove it around digging holes — apparently for no other reason than to have something to do. (Need something to do? Watch the NBA playoffs.) Backhoes are kind of hard to miss — so, yeah, cops caught the suspects after someone spotted the two young men having their joyride.
With Friends Like These: A 57-year-old man was drinking with a friend outside of a Kershaw county home when they got into an argument over crack. The suspect cut the victim across the chest. Cops came, and the suspect surrendered — informing the officers that yes, the argument was in fact over the “rock.” In the timeless words of the late Whitney Houston: Crack is whack.
We Got Guns: A 23-year-old man bought half a dozen guns on behalf of a felon. The buyer told the cops that he purchased the guns for a guy whose name he didn’t know (that’s never good) and that the unknown man told him he couldn’t buy the guns because he was a felon. That’s about as good an idea as Donald Sterling deciding to just wing it in his interview with Anderson Cooper. Cops confiscated everything from a .45 caliber pistol to a 9mm Ruger; the intended recipient of the weapons has not been found.
Tip of the Week: Before you commit a crime, watch an episode of CSI. Three men were allegedly involved with home invasions in the Hopkins area. Cops tracked reports of the home break-ins to predict where the thieves might end up and were able to pick up a shoe print at one of the homes the men invaded. Next time you want to break into a home, wear those things that doctors wear before surgery. Or — better yet — you can just not break into people’s houses.
Columbia’s Largest Sidewalk Sale
Shop local this tax free weekend! Devine Street and Five Points are teaming up for a massive sidewalk sale featuring great in-store specials from all your favorite retailers and a Saturday art stroll. Read more hereand here!
Tax-Free Weekend at Best Mattress
With big savings from July 31st-August 2nd, you can afford handcrafted quality. Free bed frame and pillows on any Full, Queen, or King set $599 and above! Click for locations and hours.
A Healthy Happy Hour
4-7 p.m at Good Life Cafe on Main St. Try our $4 local draft beers, $4 organic wine, 1/2 off select bottles of house wine and $5 handcrafted house cocktails with juices cold pressed and made daily. Click here for more info.
Relaxation, Pain Management, and Stress Relief
Licensed massage therapist Allison Morris of AMR Massage is offering 50% off your first session and every 5th session free of charge. Click here for location, hours, and more information.
New Downtown Dessert and Coffee Bar!
Tony’s Italian Eatery has teamed up with Southern Charm Sweets to bring you the highest quality dessert selection in the downtown area. 1120 Washington St., Suite 2. Find us on Facebook!
SEARCH FREE TIMES
U.S. Security Associates
Now hiring immediately for armed and unarmed security officers. WE TRAIN YOU! Columbia & surrounding areas. ussecurityassociates.com
Real Estate Spotlight
Concord Park From the $150’s. Off 12th St. Extension. 803.419.2227. mungo.com
Click here for more real estate.
WATERFORD APARTMENTS 1 & 2 BR’s available with many amenities. Prime location, and plenty of space. Live large at Waterford Apartments. Bring in our ad in Free Times for $50 off your application fee. 1340 Longcreek Dr., Columbia, SC. Click here for more info.
ST. ANDREWS COMMONS APARTMENTS 1 & 2 BR’s available with many amenities. Close to everywhere YOU WANT TO BE! 1200 St. Andrews Rd., Columbia, SC. Click here for more info.
GABLE HILL APARTMENTS 1, 2 & 3 BR’s available with many amenities. Surround yourself with Southern comforts at Gable Hill Apartments! Bring in our ad in Free Times for $50 off your application fee. 310 Ross Rd, Columbia, SC. Click here for more info.
Donate Plasma Today & Be Somebody’s Hero For Life. You could earn up to $400 a month! Program and fees vary per location. Contact your local center today. 803-736-5888. Click here for more info