| | Issue #21.01 :: 01/02/2008 - 01/08/2008 | 2007: The Rear-End List
2007's Biggest Disappointments or Albums I Hated in 2007
| BY ERIC GREENWOOD
| 1. Smashing Pumpkins, Zeitgeist, Virgin
An album that should never have happened. Billy Corgan's greed and fragile ego obviously know no bounds, as this opportunistic reinvention (can't call it a reunion if only 50% of the band is present) proves with a tepid set of legacy-tainting, embarrassingly out of touch attempts to rock like the old days.
2. Clap Your Hands Say Yeah, Some Loud Thunder, Self-released
On its surprisingly clever debut, Clap Your Hands Say Yeah made up for its many shortcomings with enough hooks and charm to compensate for some wildly obnoxious quirks. On this lazy, almost deliberately off-putting follow up, the charm is all used up and all that remains is Alex Ounsworth's fingernails-on-a-chalkboard, nasally voice that might inspire a perfectly sane person to become a cutter.
3. Editors, An End Has a Start, Fader
Editors are known as an extremely poor man's Interpol, but I find that tag insulting to Interpol. It's like these guys are trying to wrap up every late-80's alternative rock cliché into a turgidly oblique set of glittering doom that's both radio friendly and a shoe-in for a cloyingly dramatic slow-motion montage in some shitty network drama.
4. Klaxons, Myths of the Near Future, Rinse/Polydor
The Emperor doesn't even know what clothes are.
5. Bloc Party, A Weekend in the City, Vice
As much as I loved Silent Alarm, I feel the equal and opposite reaction to this follow-up. Trying too hard doesn't quite cover it. This is a tuneless mess of manufactured drama produced to a glistening sheen. The transparent attempts to become A BAND OF GREAT IMPORTANCE (caps intentional) reek disingenuously from a tiresome collection of formless dreck.
6. The Beastie Boys, The Mix-up, Capitol
Maybe getting older does make everyone become instantly clueless. That might explain why bands that try to stick around past their primes fall victim to the suck factor seemingly overnight. The Beastie Boys came perilously close on the overly sentimental To the 5 Boroughs, but this set of meandering, uninteresting instrumentals is a laborious listen, even for the most ardent of fans.
7. Linkin Park, Minutes to Midnight, Warner Bros.
I'm not exactly a Linkin Park fan, but I will admit to having not completely hated a few of their singles in the most distant, guilty-pleasure way possible. With that being said, this album sucks dong, even at shite Linkin Park standards. It doesn't rock. The lyrics are ham-fisted and beyond cliched. The production sounds like Rick Rubin pissed in an aluminum can and threw it down a flight of stairs.
8. Josh Ritter, The Historical Conquests of Josh Ritter, Sony
I listen to Sirius' indie station, Left of Center, as often as I can, and every time Josh Ritter comes on my brain forces my hand to reach immediately for the tuner to change the station. I cannot for the life of me understand what is appealing about this music. It sounds like Greg Brady, hopped up on anti-depressants, being forced to write an album as Johnny Bravo Bob Dylan.
9. Satellite Party, Ultra Payloaded, Sony
Horrific. Perry Farrell is one of those artists whose every move makes you question his legacy. How can a guy who made such weirdly passionate and vitriolic music with Jane's Addiction be so oblivious to how embarrassing he has become? Have you seen those Monday Night Football musical lead-ins with Destiny's Child leftovers, 50 Cent and Perry Farrell? WTF??? The man has turned into the musical equivalent of a white trash family winning the lottery.
10. Iron and Wine, The Shepherd's Dog, Sub Pop
Sam Beam's quietly intoxicating harmonies shone through his first two albums' lo-fi haze with grace and heartfelt sincerity. With a newfound sense of extroversion, Beam sounds like he's dipping his feet in Peter Gabriel's world music pool. It's like somebody turned a light on in the studio and all the smoke dissipated. And all the mystery went with it.
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